[Mid] A new twist on xmas

Valizan hopes all those Viking types out there find this amusing. T'was
sent to this humble shepherd by a good baron in Aethelmearc.

V.

>>> A Solstice Tale
>>>
>>> by Andy
>>>
>>> fiction
>>>
>>> "Ohhhh, where am I? How did I get here?" Odin climbed to his feet
>>and
>>> looked about him. Snow. Trees and ice. It was cold. Gingerly, the
>>> Allfather touched the large lump already well formed on his head. It
>>> was sore and it was hard for him to think clearly. Now he
>>remembered.
>>>
>>> It was that idiot Thor's fault. Ragnarok, the last battle at the end
>>> of the world had come. There he had been, fighting Fenris, the Great
>>> Wolf. Nearby, Thor fought the evil Midgard Serpent, whose tail
>>> circles the world. Thor had thrown his mighty hammer Mjolnir at the
>>> serpent. And missed. The clap of thunder that always accompanied
>>Mjolnir's
>>> blows was the last thing Odin remembered.
>>>
>>> "Where am I?" Odin thought again. Apparently the world had not come
>>> to an end for he was still in it. But the last battle was over, the
>>rest
>>> of the Aesir were gone. If he were back in Valhalla, he could look
>>> from his throne Hlidskialf, from which all things may be seen, and
>>> find out what was going on, but he wasn't. Then it came to him. This
>>> must be the promised age after Ragnarok. Gentle Baldur, raised from
>>> the dead, must be ruling in High Gimli. That must be it.
>>>
>>> A glance at the stars told the Allfather that this was the far
>>> future, and it was the Winter Solstice to boot! "The Solstice!" Odin
>>> thought.
>>>
>>> Old feelings and duties came back to him. He was sure Baldur
>>wouldn't
>>> mind if he went out and judged the people as he always did at this
>>> time of the year. He could see the lights of a town in the distance.
>>> He would begin there.
>>>
>>> Odin put two fingers to his lips and whistled. Out of the woods, as
>>> if he had been waiting for the call, came Sleipnir, Odin's eight
>>legged
>>> steed. Sleipnir whinnied and pranced as Odin approached. It had been
>>> a long time since the last ride and Sleipnir was anxious. Odin
>>patted
>>> the horse and mounted.
>>>
>>> More rapid than eagles they flew and in an instant they were in the
>>> town. The snow was deep and even and the streets were empty.
>>Brightly
>>> colored lights shone everywhere and the Allfather wondered why the
>>> people who lived here hadn't dimmed them yet to pay their respect
>>for
>>> the waning sun.
>>>
>>> Sleipnir's eight hooves echoed as Odin explored the town. Rounding a
>>> comer, Odin pulled the horse to a stop. There, across the road, was
>>a
>>> giant painting. It seemed to be a portrait of himself. His coat and
>>> cap were red instead of blue, but their white trim and fur lining
>>> were the same. His long beard was portrayed magnificently as was his
>>> less-than-magnificent lack of hair. Interestingly enough, he still
>>> had two eyes. Instead of riding Sleipnir, he was driving a sleigh
>>pulled
>>> by eight reindeer; one for each leg, he supposed.
>>>
>>> Runes on the sign read: "He knows if you've been bad or good so be
>>> good for goodness sake!" Odin realized that the painter must have
>>> thought that he needed a sleigh to carry all the treasure for the
>>> good. "The people of this age must be very good indeed, Sleipnir, if
>>> they think I can't carry all the treasure myself," the Allfather
>>> remarked.
>>>
>>> "Why do you think my spear isn't in the painting? Is everyone so
>>good
>>> that no one gets the point anymore?" Odin chuckled. Well, he would
>>> soon find out if these people were as good as they believed.
>>>
>>> The Allfather rode to the nearest house. "This place looks as good
>>as
>>> any to start the judging. Stay here boy, I'll be back soon." Odin
>>> dismounted and walked into the house, the door opening and closing
>>> behind him magically.
>>>
>>> In the living room, Odin saw the tree. It was the very image of
>>> Yggdrasil, the evergreen tree of life. It was aflame with lights as
>>> Yggdrasil had been aflame with fire in the last battle. Upon its top
>>> sat a statuette of the All-Seeing Eagle that sits atop Yggdrasil.
>>Odin
>>> squinted through the multicolored gloom. "By the Cow!" he exclaimed.
>>> "That's not an eagle, it's a winged woman!" The Allfather wondered
>>at
>>> the twists that the legends must have taken over the eons for
>>> Yggdrasil's Eagle to be transformed into a winged woman. He also
>>> noticed that Ratatosk, the messenger squirrel, was missing from the
>>> tree. "Still," Odin thought, "it is a pretty good symbol of the end
>>> of light and life at the Solstice." Presumably the people who lived
>>here
>>> would turn off the artificial light at the darkest hour and the tree
>>> would be symbolically reborn whole at dawn.
>>>
>>> "Santa, why didn't you come down the chimney? Is it because it isn't
>>> Christmas for four more days? Huh? Is it?" Odin spun around. There,
>>> head peeking out from behind a couch, was a little girl.
>>>
>>> "Why would I come down the chimney, little girl?" the Allfather
>>> asked.
>>>
>>> "Because you're supposed to. Everyone knows that." Not one to be put
>>> off his stride, Odin let that pass. His head still hurt and he
>>didn't
>>> seem to be able to peer into the little girl's heart so he would
>>have
>>> to do this the hard way.
>>>
>>> "What is your name, little girl?"
>>>
>>> "Sheila...."
>>>
>>> "And have you been a good little girl this year, Sheila?"
>>>
>>> "Yes Santa! I told you that at that at the mall yesterday when I
>>> asked you for a Barbie Dreamboat!"
>>>
>>> "Well then Sheila, here is your horse's leg...." Odin said, as he
>>> laid the piece of meat in front of her. Sheila came out and looked
>>at the
>>> leg and started to cry.
>>>
>>> "But I want a Barbie Dreamboat...."
>>>
>>> "What is a 'Barbie Dreamboat'?" Odin asked, trying to be kind.
>>> "It's a boat with a blender that makes pink lemonade."
>>> "A boat that makes lemonade? You know, don't you, that the leg will
>>> turn to gold if you guard it 'til the morrow."
>>> "I want a Barbie Dreamboat!", the girl shrieked.
>>> "You'll get the point of my spear Gungnir, like the wicked do, if
>>you
>>> don't stop whining!" the Allfather said harshly. The little girl
>>> disappeared back behind the couch.
>>>
>>> Odin walked back out into the street. "Do you think I was too harsh
>>> on her, Sleipnir? Maybe I should leave the judging until next year,
>>when
>>> I'll know for sure what happened to us." Sleipnir whinnied in
>>> apparent agreement. The little girl had seen someone at 'the mall'
>>> acting out his role. Perhaps there, he would find answers.
>>>
>>> In the twinkle of an eye, Odin and Sleipnir reached the mall. It was
>>> closed and locked, but as before, the doors magically opened before
>>> the pair. In the center of the mall the Allfather found "Santa's
>>> Village at the North Pole." "Santa," Odin remembered, was what the
>>> little girl had called him. "Do I have a village at the North Pole,
>>> Sleipnir?" Odin didn't think so, but his head still hurt and his
>>> memories were still a bit fuzzy.
>>>
>>> Odin dismounted and went over to the display. "Santa's Elves making
>>> Toys" some runes read. "Elves?" Odin thought, "Surely not." His mind
>>> might be a bit fuzzy, but he recognized dwarves when he saw them.
>>> They were short and serious looking; diligent; always crafting
>>precious
>>> treasures. Clearly, these were dwarves. Elves were tall, fair, and
>>> entirely too full of their own beauty.
>>>
>>> There he was again. This time a kindly looking woman whom the runes
>>> named "Mrs. Claus" was with him. Frigga, he supposed. She was
>>> offering him a tray of "Chocolate Chip Cookies."
>>>
>>> Behind the village was the sleigh and reindeer again. As Odin read
>>> the names of the reindeer, he burst out laughing. "Ho! Ho! Ho!" he
>>> laughed. "Donner and Blitzen; thunder and lightning." Thor's rage
>>> would shake Valhalla when he found out that he, Donar, which meant
>>> thunder, and his great palace Bilskimir, which meant lightning, had
>>> symbolically been turned into two of Sleipnir's legs.
>>>
>>> It was then that Odin noticed the ninth reindeer, apparently the
>>> leader of the team. This new reindeer, who had a glowing red nose,
>>> the runes named "Rudolph". The Allfather did not want to dwell for
>>too
>>> long on the mystery of the extra reindeer for Sleipnir did indeed
>>> have nine appendages on his underside. "Ho! Ho! Ho!" he laughed
>>> again. He might like living in this age after all. Now, if he could
>>only
>>> get Frigga to start baking cookies....
>>>
>>___
>>
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>
From: Rob Galbraith <valizan@pathcom.com>
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Received on Mon Dec 20 00:58:41 1999