[Mid] OT funny: email/ letter scams

Greetings,

  Given the lil' rash of email scams or
notifations/warnings thereof, I thought I'd share this
with everyone.
  Upon receipt of my first chain-letter, I promised
myself that when I received my tenth I would write my
own "mock" one and send it out to the amusement of all
my friends. I did receive my tenth about five years
ago and below is what I sent out with appropriate
symbols and what-not drawn all over it. Hope you find
it amusing. :)

  Kenneth Ulric Amhranai tan Briongloid,
  The Shard Bard

            CONGRATULATIONS!

  YOU are in receipt of a chain letter.

   Now don't throw this letter away. This is a very
special chain letter. This letter was created in 1170
by a Parisian monk living in the French Alps, who
became St. Francis la Loquacious Mulus. He prayed
over it daily, and dabbling in the mystical arts, drew
the symbols on the corner of the page, so that the
letter may bless all its owners with the richness of
happiness and a smile.
   The original, of which this is a copy*, has been
kept throughout the centuries by a special, chosen
guardian known as lea Andgra Etterla Eeperka, who
every 15 and a quater years sends out copies of the
letter to ensure the blessing's survival.

   Unlike other chain letters this one doesn't give
empty promises. If you mail out twenty copies of this
letter to friends, relatives, or unknown persons, the
letter DOES NOT promise that you will become lucky or
rich. As a matter of fact, if you mail off twenty
copies of this letter you will beomce, at current
postal rates, $7.40 poorer! In 1894 Mr. I.M. Friezing
of Alaska mailed off twenty copies and he did!

   On the other side of the spectrum, if you do not
mail off twenty copies of this letter, the letter DOES
NOT promise that you will become unlucky or die! In
truth if you forget about the letter, you won't get
writer's cramp or carpal tunnel syndrome from typing.
Isn't that a relief?!? Mrs. Ilene Dover threw this
letter out with the trash in 1977 and her hands have
never felt better!

   However, if you don't mail this letter, you may
experience feelings of guilt... Mr. Lon Don Fogg
received this letter in 1991 and let it collect dust
on his desk. Weeks later his friend, Sonny Daize, a
weather forecaster, found it and asked Mr. Fogg why he
didn't pass it on to him. It would have been perfect
as an ice breaker for his speech at the weather
forecaster's convention.
    Indeed, it is even said that when the playwright
Marlowe received this letter and did not show it to
William Shakespear, that a great tempest brewed, and a
large fight broke out.... much ado about nothing!

    So you see, this letter will neither place the
sword of Damocles over your head, nor place a crown
upon it, but it is a lot of fun. If you know of
someone who is depressed, send the letter on to them.
You may even increase the power of the belssing by
writting your own favorite joke or anecdote on the
bottom or back of the letter. You may also increase
the power of the blessing by allowing several people
to inscribe their words on the letter and send it back
to this century's guardian at: The Blessed Chain
Letter c/o The Sacred Guardian 1087 N. Green Mount
Road Belleville, Il. 62221. Send NO money
whatsoever!** In order to recieve the blessing of
happiness you only have to keep or send off this
letter.

      God Bless,

     St. Francis la Loquacious Mulus

* ever wonder if this is a copy of the original how it
received such modern dates on it?

** well, okay, if you have a couple of loose pennies
lying about, we'll take those but NOTHING else.....
 

                
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From: Jonathan Thorn <courtbardkenneth@yahoo.com>
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Received on Fri Jun 17 00:16:28 2005